Friday, June 24, 2005

want to know what screwed up really means?
check out my life now..
THERE at our one A chalet.
nothing could go wrong right?
WRONG.
so many things happened.
and to add on.

My camera, it's lost
you say. in translation? not funny
MANN. wth was i thinkin
when i rushed back into the room
to get that camera.
if only
if only. the camera was forgotten for just that moment
if only. i didn't feel obligated to bring it out
it would have meant something now.
the usual equation would be less disastrous
at least, minus this misery.
minus the guilt, the shame
and the pain
after all that's been done,
what to say?
you didn't think of me ,
tried to care
i didn't buy that
cause the little things you do
contradict.
first it's words of comfort
then it ends of with you mocking me
right down to everything i do. to the things i say
and till the sun sets, with you not even recognising me
i don't know what it brings you.
but i'm sure. to let you know,
i'm ain't nobody's fool.
certainly, not a fool . for you
i hope you know that all i'm left with are flashbacks of
the past. thoughts of my stupidity keep haunting me
the sound of angry voices linger in my head.
especially when they come from the people you love
ever so dearly
I feel like screaming my lungs out
but i can't seem to find my voice
not anymore
i've lost the will to speak out.
If at that time i had the courage to do so
things would not have happened
if i had the sense to realise the danger
out there
nothing would have gone wrong
yet, it's all in His hands we say
that's a truth
you can never change..
i'll try. to stay brave
and you should know
even if -
tears form behind my eyes
but i do not cry
counting the days that pass me by
and i say goodbye
to you
my less than 1yrold camera
if only i had treated yoo better.
once again , we endure the pain
of bitter farewells
if anything, i'm sorry for whatever pain i've caused
but still i'm not accepting how
you taunt me. mock me
tease me.
you're confusing me
there's no one i can turn to
the four walls are caving in..
and yes, IM SORRY

yesterday. it happened
like dejavu